Widow Demands To Be Heard After War Veteran Husband's Tragic Descent To Suicide itv.com
I tried to get him help, I was trying to save his life and people didn’t work with me."
For years Jo Jukes lived with a war veteran husband suffering from worsening post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and acute depression – while desperately seeking help for him.
Now she is a widow after Lance Corporal Dave Jukes took his own life in October behind the family's home in Birmingham.
He had been sleeping rough in an alleyway after his volatile behaviour meant his wife had to make the agonising decision of taking out a court order banning him from entering their home.
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Dave Jukes
Dave Jukes was sleeping rough as his behaviour was too volatile to be around his family. Credit: Family handout
It was a shocking end to the life of a former infantryman, 49, who had served in almost every major campaign British forces have been involved in over the last 25 years.
"He survived Northern Ireland, Bosnia, two Iraqs, Afghanistan, but his service killed him in the end," Mrs Jukes told ITV News.
She had witnessed him spiral away from the "funny, very committed" man who had proposed to her by hiding a ring in the paws of a teddy bear.
"All he wanted was to be part of a family," she remembered of the man she married.
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Dave Jukes
All Dave Jukes wanted was to be part of a family, his wife said. Credit: Family handout
Mr Jukes had already had mental health problems by the time the couple met in 2008.
The strain briefly put an end to the relationship as he suffered a breakdown and was sectioned before being formally diagnosed with PTSD.
That was followed by therapy that Mrs Jukes said took him "back to a normal kind of person, a lot more relaxed".
But his return to active duty as a married man quickly "brought everything back".
It was in Afghanistan in late 2011 that the Army careerist called home and, for the first time, told his wife: "I can't do this."
Jo Jukes
Jo Jukes said the couple's pleas for help were 'not listened to'. Credit: ITV News
The impact of leaving the Army and the mental scars he had collected from a life of service quickly took a toll greater than the antidepressants prescribed by a GP could combat, Mrs Jukes said.
"In his mind he was still the same bloke, but to the outside world he wasn't," she added.
"That's when it first started, and it gradually over the years got worse and worse."
He would have flashbacks and nightmares.
He would sweat through the night, or get up and say: "I can't handle this."
Survivor's guilt from "something that happened" in Iraq would see him frequently ask his wife: "Why am I alive and they're not?"
Dave Jukes
Dave Jukes suffered from survivors' guilt. Credit: Family handout
Mr Dukes had gone public with his struggles, describing the dreadful impact of PTSD in a video to raise awareness in 2016.
"Having bad thoughts every day, suicidal thoughts, is not a nice thing to live with," he said as he performed press-ups in front of the camera.
Living with those thoughts made him increasingly dangerous for those who lived with him.
Towards the end of his life, now jobless and in the grips of PTSD, his loved ones had to leave the property after he barricaded himself into the family's attic and refused all offers of help.
"It ended up where he smashed up the house, which wasn't Dave.
"Dave wouldn't do that," Mrs Jukes said.
Jo Jukes
Dave Jukes' deteriorating mental health led to his smashing up the family's home. Credit: ITV News
She added that the family had been repeatedly let down.
She continued trying to get help for him, from the GP, the local health authority, the Ministry of Defence and veterans' charities.
She says the couple would "just get passed from pillar to post" and that some officials even doubted the authenticity of her husband's descriptions of his problems.
"I think that because he had complex PTSD I think they didn’t understand his symptoms or what he was talking about, and because of that they didn’t believe what he was saying," she said.
"In his mind nobody understood him and what he was going through."
She said officials had not built up a relationship with him.
"There was nobody that had his trust. They kept making him retell his story."
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